My name shall be nameless for the time being. I got into a legal... dispute with the Bureau of Making Your Life Miserable [affectionately pronounced "BOMa-YoLiM"]
But completely ignore that fact (and the black van parked outside) for a few minutes, as I tell a long winded tale about myself that may or may not be true...
I am one of the Whales' technical engineers. My tasks: program weird random shit, make computers bow down to my will (unless made by Apple - then it works the other way round), and make cases of Dr. K soda spontaneously combust and/or randomly appear on people's doorsteps.
Unlike the rest of us, I have very crappy storytelling skills, and DEFINITELY can't draw shit to save my life. I CAN wield a computer. I can also play Pokemon (TCG and VG kinda-ish), Minecraft (often abusing op-powers to spam lightning, "accidentally" make 4,000 blocks of live TNT appear, and other horrifically horrible pranks), and watch Ponies.
I had an aspiration for SFM and other rendering before finding out my Mac won't do more than 3 FPS unless running OSX. My dream laptop costs $1,700 and I have no job - yet.
Tune in next Nameless Tuesday for some hopefully less shitty shit!
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